The Town Suffers From Brown-Outs

| Canada | Children, Non-Dialogue

I grew up in a small town that is primarily Caucasian. When I was three years old my mom took me to a mall that had a much more diverse community. Being that young I don’t remember what happened that day but my mom will never forget that trip.

Apparently I looked around and shouted: “Mommy this is just like [Town] mall except for all the brown people!”

On Track For Entitlement

| FL, USA | Siblings

(This was in the early ‘80s when track-suits were the rage. My younger sister starts community college and needs one for gym.)

Sister: “I need a track suit for gym, but I’m broke.”

Me: “Don’t worry I’ll buy you one.”

Sister: “I can’t decide between these two track-suits. I guess I’ll pay for the second one myself.”

Me: “…”

Dish-Scam

| Holyoke, MA, USA | Sons & Daughters

(My son detests dollar stores while I love them.)

Me: “Wait a minute. I want to go into the dollar store and get a new dishpan.”

Son: “Why can’t you get one at [Big Store]?”

Me: “I don’t feel like walking that far and besides, they’re the same brand, made by the same company.”

Son: “They’re probably counterfeit.”

Me: “Nobody counterfeits dishpans.”

It Is Not Classy To Discuss In Public

| USA | Children, Parents & Guardians, Sons & Daughters

(I am female. I am just learning about puberty and what it entails. I have just started middle school and am introduced to having classes in blocks. I am also not very conscious about what I say. My mother and I are in a supermarket.)

Me: *very loudly* “Mom, am I going to have periods for the rest of my life?”

(My mom’s eyes go wide as she looks around for other people that might have heard, but there is no one.)

Mom: [My Name], don’t say that out loud; that’s a question you ask in private.”

Me: *confused* “Why?”

Mom: “That’s a private question.”

Me: “But I’ve been talking about it with my friends.”

Mom: “What?! What did they tell you?”

Me: “When they have classes.”

(My mom now looks confused:)

Mom: “Huh?”

Me: “Am I going to have class periods for the rest of my school years?”

Mom: *visibly relieved* “Oh, oh. That’s what you meant.”

The Bottom Of All Punishments

| MI, USA | Children, Sons & Daughters

(My sister is out shopping with her toddler son. He can’t make up his mind if he wants to walk or sit in his stroller, so he keeps climbing out and back in.)

Mother: *exasperated* “You can stay in or out, but make up your mind, or I am going to strap your bottom in there!”

Son: *suddenly screaming and crying* “Nooo, Mama! Don’t strap my bottom!”

Mother: *speechless*

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