Category: Spouses & Partners

Snow Chance That’s True

| Sacramento, CA, USA | Spouses & Partners

(It’s winter time. During the course of conversation with my husband, he tells me he’s never played in the snow before. Growing up in Southern CA, this isn’t uncommon, but my family – from Northern CA – is shocked.)

Me: “You’ve really never played in the snow before? Ever, in your whole life?”

Husband: “Nope!”

(So I ask him if he’d like to take a trip up to the mountains for his birthday, to spend an afternoon in the snow, and he excitedly agrees. We make our plans for the trip based on whether he’s done various things, like making snowmen and/or snow angels, having snowball fights, and so on. My husband keeps insisting he’s never done any of it. On the day of the trip, my family, my husband, and I all pile into the SUV together to drive up the mountain…)

Mother: “Wow, [Husband]; I can’t believe you’ve never been to the snow!”

Husband: “Yeah, we just never really went and did stuff like that. It doesn’t snow where I grew up.”

Mother’s Boyfriend: “Man, so you’ve never even been sledding or ANYTHING?”

Husband: “Well, I’ve been sledding before.”

Everyone: “…”

Me: “Wait, if you’ve never been to the snow, how have you been sledding before?”

Husband: “We went sledding in the snow at my aunt’s house during Christmas time!”

Me: “But we’d all been asking you if you’d ever played in the snow before, and you just said you never had!”

Husband: “Well, because it was a long time ago!”

Me: “[Husband], it still counts as playing in the snow even if you hadn’t done it for years.”

Husband: “I dunno. I guess so.”

It Takes A Real Man

| USA | Cousins, Spouses & Partners

(My cousin and I are out to lunch, just chatting and catching up. Both of us are married. I have a toddler and she has a set of twins who are about a year younger than my son.)

Cousin: “I don’t know how you do it! You have a full time career, then come home and are a great mom, AND you are starting up a business! I can’t imagine how you get everything done.”

Me: “I can only do it because of [Husband]. He’s a stay at home dad and watches [Toddler] all day, supports me 100% in my career, and is helping me by doing most of the background work to get the business up and running. Most of the credit goes to him. He really does most of the hard work.”

Cousin: “Well, yeah, I mean, I guess he helps out some, but really, you’re an inspiration and I don’t know how you juggle everything that you have going on.”

Me: “Thank you, but it really is all him.”

(My cousin dropped the subject after that.)

OOOOOHDIPUS

| USA | Children, Spouses & Partners

(My husband is getting ready to leave for an outing with friends. I’ve just told our toddler that we are going to watch movies all night with daddy gone. My husband and I steal into the hallway for a quick make out session before he leaves.)

Toddler: *running into the hallway and pulling on our legs* “MAMA! MAMA! MAMA! MAMA!”

Me: “Our son is jealous that you have my attention.”

Husband: “Good. Let him be jealous.”

(Just as he goes in for another kiss:)

Toddler: *very angrily* “OOOH!”

(We both cracked up, the moment completely gone.)

Charged With Energy

| St. John's, NL, Canada | Children, Spouses & Partners

(My one-and-a-half-year-old son is acting up. Since my husband and I both feel like he’s too young to punish, we try to distract him with his toys. It usually works but today things go a little differently.)

Me: “I can’t get [Son] to calm down. He just got up from a nap, he used the toilet, and he ate 10 minutes ago!”

Husband: “Give him a toy. He’s just bored.”

Me: “[Son] isn’t interested in any of his toys today. It’s like he just doesn’t care anymore.”

Husband: “I have an idea.”

(My husband gets his phone charger and hands it to our son.)

Me: “What the h*** are you doing?! That’s dangerous.”

Husband: “I’m not done yet.”

(My husband removes the cord from the plug, gets a black marker, and draws two small lines on the wall.)

Husband: “Hey, [Son], can you plug that in for me?”

(My son spent the next ten minutes trying to plug the charger into the solid wall and wore himself out to the point that he didn’t make a fuss for the rest of the day — an all-time best for him.)

They’re Losing It

, | Australia | Spouses & Partners, Trigger Story

(Our house in general, has a lot of “stuff” that gets left lying around, which makes it easy to lose things. I’m generally good at knowing where this lost stuff is, but my fiancé, not so much. I receive this text:)

Fiancé: *text* “After years of dedicated detective work, a decade of heartbreak and struggle, hundreds of hours of interrogation, the open case of the missing wallet was finally closed. The culprit…? A shopping bag sitting next to the washing basket.”

(It had been five days.)

 

Dear readers:

This is a story between an engaged couple, discussing a non-relationship issue. Do you think it belongs on Not Always Romantic, or does the subject matter make it Not Always Related? Please discuss in the comments!

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