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    Category: Siblings

    Time To Assay The Essay Situation, Part 4

    | WA, USA | Parents & Guardians, Siblings

    (My mom, sister, and I are in the car talking about all the homework we need to do over the weekend. My mom reminds my sister of an essay she needs to write.)

    Mom: “This is. like. the second time I’ve reminded you.”

    Sister: “It’s, like, the hundredth!”

    Me: “Those are two very different numbers…”

    Mom: “It’s somewhere between the two.”

    Sister: “No, it’s, like, the thousandth time!”

    Me: “You just multiplied your number by ten.”

    Mom: “Yet the essay is still not done…”

    Sister: “Mom! That’s, like, the millionth time you’ve told me!”

    Mom: “Yet it’s still not done…”

    From Not Always Learning:
    Time To Assay The Essay Situation, Part 3
    Time To Assay The Essay Situation, Part 2
    Time To Assay The Essay Situation

    What The Truck?

    | USA | Siblings

    (I am with my sister on a road-trip with one of her friends. We’ve been on the road for more than 12 hours. My sister is driving and is getting very tired, so we decide to pull over to a rest stop to take a break. We approach a sign directing cars to go one way and trucks to go the other.)

    Sister: “Am I a car or a truck?”

    Me: “What?”

    Sister: *sleepy and panicked* “Am I a car or a truck? AM I A CAR OR A TRUCK!?”

    Me: “You’re a car.”

    (She ended up driving into the truck lot and parking there anyway. After a short nap, she was better.)

    The Ridicule Molecule

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Siblings, Themed Giveaway

    (My little brother likes to come up with creepy pickup lines and then test them on me. On a trip to the mall, I am followed around a brain games store by an employee who is a bit socially awkward, but still trying to flirt with me despite my efforts to get him away from me.)

    Brother: *after leaving the store, lurks over me whilst breathing heavily and waggling his eyebrows in an imitation of the employee* “I feel we have bonded on a sub-molecular level.”

    Mothers Are Friends, Not Food

    | IL, USA | Children, Nephews & Nieces, Siblings

    (My sister and I have met for lunch. Throughout our meal, she keeps fidgeting in her seat and wincing. I finally ask her if she’s okay.)

    Sister: Oh! Yeah. It’s nothing, just…

    (She glances around and lowers her voice.)

    Sister: “My son bit me yesterday. On the a**.”

    Me: “… What.”

    Sister: *sighs* “He had just watched Finding Nemo and was pretending he was a shark. I was fixing him a snack afterward, and he just… snuck up behind me and…” *makes chomping sound*

    Me: *stifling laughter* “I’m sorry. That’s not funny… but it kind of is!”

    Sister: “I’m just glad I was wearing jeans and not sweatpants!”

    Vegan Grief

    | Brisbane, QLD, Australia | Siblings

    (I am playing Minecraft on the Xbox with my sister. She usually takes a very vegetarian approach when playing, refusing to kill any animals.)

    Me: “So, have you seen that new update for the computer version yet?”

    Sister: “No. What’s it like?”

    Me: “Well, they added in stained glass…”

    Sister: “Is it stained with the blood of the animals you kill?”

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