Not Always Related on Facebook Not Always Related on Twitter
Featured Story:
  • Playing Fair Cop With The Brothers
    (592 thumbs up)
  • July's Theme Of The Month: Gullible Family!
    Submit your story today!

    Metal Defector

    | Oxford, England, UK | Parents & Guardians

    (My dad is a big fan of the indie singer-songwriter ‘Passenger.’ When he likes something he tends to spend quite a lot of money on it so I’m not surprised when he orders his whole back catalogue online. He brings some of the CDs when he comes to visit me.)

    Dad: “I bought you something; I didn’t like this one so I thought I’d give it to you.”

    (He chucks a ‘Passenger’ CD on my coffee table. A week later I get around to playing it and quickly figure out the problem, so I phone him.)

    Me: “I think I might have worked out why you didn’t enjoy that Passenger CD.”

    Dad: “It was pretty strange.”

    Me: “So, fun fact: Passenger is the name of both a singer-songwriter AND a Swedish metal band from the 90s…”

    (It turned out he thought that it was just an album from the artist’s ‘experimental phase’ and had listened unhappily to a good few songs before admitting defeat!)

    Endowment Empowerment

    | UT, USA | In-Laws

    (My mother-in-law has just given my two-month-old son a bath and is getting a diaper on him.)

    Mother-In-Law: “One thing I really remember about [My Husband] was that even as a baby he was so well endowed down there.”

    Me: “Uh…”

    Mother-In-Law: “Really, it was so strange to see a baby so… big… and endowed.” *to my son in a baby voice* “I guess you didn’t get that from daddy, but maybe it’ll happen.”

    Seems To Be Blowing This Sky High

    | Atlanta, GA, USA | Children, Nephews & Nieces

    (My nephew is going through a phase. We are helping my mom run errands.)

    Me: “Oh, look at Grammy! She’s walking really well without a cane now.”

    Nephew: “No, you’re wrong.”

    Me: “No, really, look. No cane.”

    Nephew: “Nope. She uses a cane.”

    Me: “Look, she does not have the cane WITH her.” *I point to show him*

    Nephew: “Oh… well, I thought you said she did have a cane. It’s because you don’t talk clearly.”

    Me: “My enunciation is fine. It’s something I’ve noticed with you recently; you don’t even listen to me and you just say I’m wrong. I could tell you the sky is blue and you would say it was wrong because you didn’t listen. It makes me sad because I think that you don’t care about what I say.”

    Nephew: “Oh, well, sometimes my brain is too full and it deletes some words.”

    Me: “Well, we should work on that.”

    Nephew: “Besides, the sky isn’t blue. It’s light blue.”

    Catering For Your Future

    | Washington, DC, USA | Parents & Guardians, Siblings, Sons & Daughters

    (We’re on a family walk through a very nice neighborhood. My younger sister is walking beside our mother, a little ahead of my father and me. We are all pointing out our favorite houses as we pass them. Suddenly, my mother shoves my younger sister off the sidewalk and into the street.)

    Sister: “Hey!”

    Dad: “Everything all right up there?”

    Mom: “Did you hear what she just said to me!?”

    Dad: “No, why? What’d she say?”

    Mom: “I asked if she’s gonna have a room for me when she gets all rich and famous and buys her big house. She said ‘Sure am. It’s gonna have hardwood floors, granite countertops, and stainless steel appliances. It’s gonna be called “The Kitchen.’”’”

    Reading You Your Rights

    | Thurmont, MD, USA | Children, Parents & Guardians, Sons & Daughters

    (I am five years old. My parents, my little brother, and I are on our way home after a day out.)

    Me: “I’m hungry! Mom, can stop somewhere?”

    Mom: “No, [My Name]. Besides, there isn’t anywhere out here to eat!”

    Me: “Yes, there is! That sign says ‘restaurant!’”

    Mom: “The jig is up! The kid can read!”


    Page 1/64112345...Last
    Next Page »