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    Category: In-Laws

    In-Laws Are The Butt Of All Family Jokes

    | Seward, AK, USA | In-Laws, Siblings

    (My brother-in-law and I are having a cigarette outside when this happens.)

    Brother-In-Law: *rolling his cigarette in between his fingers* “Hey, feel my butt. It feels weird.”

    Me: “…wha?”

    Brother-In-Law: “MY CIGARETTE BUTT.”

    Finally Got It Together About A Get Together

    | Sydney, NSW, Australia | In-Laws, Spouses & Partners

    (My husband and I have noticed that we rarely get invites to his family get-togethers. We usually find out after the fact, when one of his step siblings rings to ask why we weren’t there.)

    Husband: “[Step Mum] called today, to tell us about a party at [Sister]’s place.”

    Me: “When is it?”

    Husband:  ”Tomorrow”

    Me:  ”It’s unusual for her to remember to call us.”

    Husband:  ”Yeah, it’s probably only because they need a lift.”

    A Weighty Statement

    | Romania | In-Laws, Parents & Guardians, Spouses & Partners

    (Me, my husband, his mother, and our eight-year-old son are sitting at a table dining. Our son is unhappy about losing a toy and we try to comfort him in a pretty traditional way…)

    Mother-In-Law: “Don’t be sad, Sometimes losing things means they made space for something else in your life…”

    Husband: “Yes, and losing is sometimes good, and it makes you happy!”

    Me: “For instance, when you lose some weight!”

    Mother-In-Law: *not listening* “…and maybe someone else finds what you lost and is happy to have it.”

    (Everyone burst out laughing leaving my mother-in-law confused.)

    Your Death Will Be Ornamental

    | CA, USA | In-Laws

    (My wife did some volunteering for the horticulture department at the local college, and received a few trees, most of them ornamental. My mother-in-law, whom we live with, comes knocking at our door.)

    Mother-In-Law: “What are these?” *holds up a bitten into fruit*

    Me: “An ornamental pear, I think.”

    Mother-In-Law: ”Is it edible?” *takes another bite*

    Me: “It’s… ornamental.”

    Mother-In-Law: ”But is it edible?”

    Me: “I guess, but I’m not even sure that’s what it is.”

    Mother-In-Law: ”Well, they sure are tasty! Look it up on your computer and tell me if I’m going to die tonight!” *takes another bite and walks off*

    Putting The Kin In Anakin

    | Denver, CO, USA | In-Laws, Parents & Guardians, Theme Of The Month

    (It is my wedding. My husband and I are huge Star Wars fans and we walked down the aisle as Han and Leia. After the ceremony, my dad walks up to my husband.)

    Dad: “[Husband], I am your father… in-law.”


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