Cooking Remains A Pie In The Sky Endeavor

| Tampa, FL, USA | Parents & Guardians

(A few years ago, I had Thanksgiving at my mother’s house. I generally don’t like cooking away from home because I know where all my utensils are and which ingredients I have. I’ve agreed to make the pies this year.)

Me: “Okay, so all I need to get is condensed milk and the pumpkin pie mix, right?”

Mom: “Yep, I have everything else ready for you.”

Me: *grabs water from fridge* “Um, you don’t have any eggs.”

Mom: “Oh, right. Get eggs, too. I forgot.”

(I get to the grocery store, grab the three items, and am checking out.)

Mom: *in a text* “I don’t have any pie tins. Get pie tins.”


About To Get Some Baggage

| TN, USA | Siblings

(My brother and I, as siblings tend to, are at each-other’s throats a lot. It should also be noted that he is very sweet to girls — except for me. When we were preteens, my family went shopping, and we were at the check-out getting ready to leave. Now, the bagger was a short woman who had the same hair color as me, and similar glasses. I was bored so I took my mother’s phone and went to go play on it while waiting at the doors.)

Brother: *not paying attention, and says to Bagger* “You know you’re doing it wrong, right? The soda is supposed to go on the bottom.”

Bagger: *puts soda on bottom*

Brother: “You gotta put the bread in the baby seat, idiot.”

Bagger: *puts bread in baby seat*

Brother: “OH, MY GOD! Can’t you do anything right? You should be locked up, you’re so stupid!”

Bagger: *looks up, trying to see if there’s anything else to bag*

Brother: *goes pale* “Wait, you’re not [My Name]!”

Mother: *realizes what’s going on, and starts laughing at my brother*

Brother: “OH, MY GOD! I’m so sorry! I thought you were my sister!”

Me: *still playing game by the door*

(After that my brother refused to go shopping with us, and every time the rest of us went, we would ask him if he wanted to go see his “girlfriend at the store.”)


Renting ‘Final Destination’

| Denver, CO, USA | Grandchildren

(Heard this on the way out of the supermarket.)

Little Girl: *at a video rental kiosk* “Grandpa! You’re going to die if you don’t hurry up!”


That Boy Has A Great Night Ahead Of Him

| Dallas, TX, USA | Children, Popular, Sons & Daughters

(I am waiting in line at the cashier with my youngest son, who is four. Behind me are a couple of college-aged kids. When it’s my turn, I approach the register and the cashier greets me and my son, who is playing with his Toy Story toys in the cart.)

Cashier: “How are you doing today, young man?”

Son: “Great! I’ve got a Buzz, and a Woody!”

(The kids behind me were still laughing when we left the store.)


Oh, Brother

| Pakistan | Children, Popular, Siblings

(My little brother is 16 years younger than me. This incident is around the time when I was still getting used to having him around. He is three-and-a-half at this time. Due to my tomboy nature, I feel uncomfortable if he calls me sister, big sister, etc. I have asked him to just call me by my name. He sometimes even calls me brother to make me happy even though he knows perfectly well that I am his sister. We are shopping at a grocery store near our home. As we are regulars, the manager knows us and comes over to say hello.)

Manager: *shaking my brothers hand* “Hello! How are you, young man?”

Brother: *smiling* “I am happy.”

Manager: “I can see that. You found your favourite ice cream. Whom did you bring with you?” *despite knowing me and just making conversation*

(My brother looks thoughtful and looks at me for a moment before announcing proudly.)

Brother: “My big brother.”

(He then just hopped down the stairs. I felt happy knowing that he had said that because he knew that would make me feel good. The manager just smiled. I have become much more accepting and don’t mind if he calls me sis sometimes instead of my name. We just made a bond that day. He is five now and thriving.)

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