Telling Colorful Tall Stories

| USA | Parents & Guardians, Popular, Siblings

(My dad is 6’4″, and at this point he’s dressed up for a meeting.)

Dad: “Don’t I look taller in blue? I think blue makes me look taller.”

Sister: “Yep, definitely. If you wear any other color it makes you look shorter… One time you were wearing red and I kept looking up going, ‘Dad! Dad! Where are you?’”


Just Run With It

| UT, USA | Sons & Daughters

(I’m grocery shopping with my two-year-old. We’re walking down an aisle and there’s other people in the way. The store isn’t busy, but we usually go when the store is pretty empty.)

Son: “Mom, there’s lots of people.”

Me: “It’s okay; it just means we have to wait our turn.”

Son: “We have to run over them!”


Got Very Dark (Ages)

| USA | Parents & Guardians, Siblings

(My mother has just turned 60, and my sister turned 21. Their birthdays are about a month apart. My great grandmother died several years ago at 102.)

Mom: “I just realized something. In 40 years you’ll be my age, and I’ll be as old as great-grandma.”

Sister: “Yeah? Well, when I’m as old as great-grandma you’ll have worms and maggots crawling through you.”

Mom: “No, I won’t… They’ll have stopped by then…”


Unlucky Number Seven

| Tulsa, OK, USA | Sons & Daughters

Daughter: *from the next room* “Dad, what’s the wi-fi password?”

Me: “Let me look it up… ready?”

Daughter: “Yes.”

Me: “7.”

Daughter: “Hold on!”

Me: “I only called off one number!”


TPical Behavior

| UT, USA | Popular, Siblings

(It’s two days after my first novel gets published and I’m nervous as anything. Then I get news that a newspaper reviewed it and go to the link. She’s not all that enthusiastic about it and since I’ve never been reviewed by a paper before, I’m a little sad. I tell my roommate and friend, but not my family. The following day…)

Sister: “Do you have the address of the lady from [Newspaper]? I’ve always wanted to teach my sons how to TP a house.”

Me: “I’m feeling better about it now, so hold off on the TP.”

(Anyway, I love my sister for her loyalty!)