Category: Siblings

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They’re The Same Thing, Really

| USA | Siblings

(I’m a college student. One day, I’m sitting at the kitchen table, marking up the textbook for one of my classes. My youngest sister is six, and at home with a fever. She comes over to see what I’m doing.)

Sister: “Why are you drawing in that book? I thought only babies did that.”

Me: *laughing* “Babies, and college students.”

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Vegan Poop Cake

| IL, USA | Aunts & Uncles, Siblings

(We are sitting on the front steps watching my niece play on the lawn when my aunt comes out the front door. Earlier we had been discussing veganism.)

Aunt: “There’s cake inside.” *pauses* “The baby’s eating dirt.”

Brother: “Meh. It’s good for her immune system.”

Aunt: “Okay, but I can’t guarantee there isn’t dog poop on it. Also, there’s cake inside.”

Brother: “Poop is probably also good for her immune system. Plus it’s vegan.”

Me: “I don’t think so; it’s an animal product.”

Brother: “But what about manure as a fertilizer? Don’t all the organic farms do that?”

Me: “That’s a good question; the argument could be made that manure is produced by cow labor. ”

Brother: “So, the question is, if a grass-fed, pasture-raised cow named Frank who has had a life full of love, poops in a garden in the Irish countryside, are the vegetables still vegan?”

Aunt: “DOES NO ONE WANT CAKE?!”

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Weighty Dinner-table Discussions

| Toronto, ON, Canada | Children, Siblings

(One of my three sons asks the family a question at the supper table:)

Son: “If you could get rid of any of the laws in our country, which one would it be?”

(We pause for thought, all except his little brother.)

Little Brother: *excitedly* “The law of gravity!”

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