Category: Grandchildren


Brother From Another

| OH, USA | Grandchildren

(One grandson is talking about a friend’s brothers.)

Younger Grandson: “Brothers are stupid.”

Me: *grinning and turning around to say* “You know you’re a brother; right?”


Pooling Together Your Belief

| OH, USA | Grandchildren

(Our six-year-old grandson has begun repeating, “I believe in myself” while attempting a difficult or scary situation. While trying to teach him to float in the pool, he gets too scared and demands to be taken to the side of the pool.)

Me: “What happened to believing in yourself?”

Grandson: “I believe in myself… hanging on the edge of the pool.”


Renting ‘Final Destination’

| Denver, CO, USA | Grandchildren

(Heard this on the way out of the supermarket.)

Little Girl: *at a video rental kiosk* “Grandpa! You’re going to die if you don’t hurry up!”


Making Middle Earth Great Again

| OH, USA | Grandchildren

(Strung between two roadside poles was a reddish-orange banner for a racist, misogynist candidate I despise. Just as I notice it, my grandson says:)

Grandson: “Is that the Eye of Sauron?”


Having A Ball With It

| OH, USA | Grandchildren

(My husband and I like to take our grandsons to a local pizza place which has a few arcade games. One machine always gives a player a small rubber ball at the end. They head home with at least four balls. Neither boy knows the other meaning of “balls,” so they innocently say things the rest of us have trouble not reacting to:)

Grandson #1: *still at the machine* “Grandma! We’re filling our pants with balls!”

Grandson #2: *after being told to take the balls out of their pockets for the ride home* “Nah… we like squishing our balls.”

Grandson #1: *coming back from the claw machine* “Look! I’ve got big balls now!”

Grandson #2: *after getting in trouble* “Papa took away my balls.”

Grandson #1: *in the car* “My balls dropped. [Brother] picked them up and is hiding them between his legs.”

Grandson #2: *after a particularly large haul* “I’m going to give Daddy some of these because he needs balls.”

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