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    This Is Fruitless

    | London, England, UK | Parents & Guardians, Siblings

    (We’ve just eaten a large roast meal, and are all lounging around while my mother sorts out some dessert. She comes into the living room and starts talking to my 12-year old brother.)

    Mum: “Do you want some apple danish?”

    Brother: *looks up* “What flavour is it?”

    Mum: “Well, it’s apple danish.”

    Brother: “Yeah, but what flavour is it?”

    Mum: “Listen to me. It’s apple danish. Apple. Danish.”

    Brother: *angrily* “But what flavour is it?”

    (My stepdad and I are beside ourselves trying not to laugh at this point.)

    Mum: “It’s APPLE danish.”

    Brother: “What flavour is it?!”

    Mum: yelling “Its blackcurrant!”

    Brother: “Oh no, I don’t like that.”

    (Later that evening, he saw the left over apple danish and got upset that no one had offered him any.)