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    Hosting An Attitude

    | Germany | Children, Godparents & Godchildren

    (I’m over at my friend’s house and we’re just sitting and talking, when her seven-year-old son (who is my godson) appears in the door.)

    Godson: “Everything all right with you? Do you want something to drink?”

    Me: “We’re fine, thanks. Why do you ask?”

    Godson: “Well, when I have friends over, mom always asks if everything is all right and if we want some drinks…” *smiles and leaves*

    Less Sports, More Illustrated

    | USA | Parents & Guardians, Siblings

    (My dad is a big sports fan and one day he brings home a ‘Sports Illustrated’ magazine. My sister and I are six and eight at the time.)

    Dad: *excitedly* “Hey! I heard there’s a new tournament going on soon!”

    Mom: “Oh, really?” *goes over to see*

    Sister: “What’s going on?”

    Mom: “Your dad is saying something about sports tournament.”

    Dad: “Yeah it should be here in this… magazine…”

    (He turns the pages and there’s nothing there but practically naked women.)

    Dad: “Uh…”

    Mom: “What kind of magazine is this?”

    Dad: “It’s a sports magazine… I think…”

    (He turns more pages.)

    Dad: “Where’re all the sports?!”

    For Crying Out Loud

    | USA | Parents & Guardians

    (I’m naturally quite loud, and it’s a joke in my family that I don’t have an indoor voice. My dad makes fun of me quite a bit, even though he can be quite loud, too. We’re sitting having a quiet discussion one evening and I decide to shout to my sister, who is across the room.)

    Dad: “[My Name], you don’t have lungs. You have a megaphone.”

    Obama Drama

    | Lexington, KY, USA | Aunts & Uncles, Cousins

    (It is around the time the 2008 Presidential campaign is beginning to pick up steam, and since my family’s African American, everyone is buzzing about Barack Obama, although some of the older relatives are rather skeptical.)

    Cousin: “Can you believe this? It looks like he may have a shot.”

    Uncle: “Huh. He won’t win.”

    Me: “What makes you think that?”

    Uncle: “With the way this country works, he’ll never make it past the primaries. Mark my words.”

    Me: “Actually, the primaries are over. He did make it.”

    Uncle: “Oh… uh… he still won’t make it.”

    (I really wish I could’ve been there to see his reaction when Obama won the national election… for both terms.)

    Not So Pretty Princess Home

    | TX, USA | Nephews & Nieces

    (My three-year-old niece and I are on my computer, playing a Disney princess game.)

    Niece: “That one’s me!” *points to Ariel*

    Me: “Because you have pretty red hair like her?”

    Niece: “Yes! And that one’s me.” *points to Snow White*

    Me: “Because you have a pretty dress like hers?”

    Niece: “Yes! And that one’s me!” *points to Sleeping Beauty*

    Me: “But which one is me?”

    Niece: “No, not you.”

    Me: “Aww, none of the princesses are me? Why not?”

    Niece: “You’re not pretty.”


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