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  • November Theme Of The Month: Thanksgiving!

    Dad Is A-meusli’d

    | Tulalip, WA, USA | Parents & Guardians

    (My dad had just gone shopping and was explaining to my mom what all he got:)

    Dad: “And I got some granola. You should like it; it’s got… crap in it and stuff.”

    Being Complete TV Nazis

    | Allentown, PA, USA | Parents & Guardians, Siblings

    (It’s 1999 and my sister and I are seven and nine respectively. My dad just got the video game, ‘Medal of Honor,’ and really wants to play it, but my sister and I are hogging the TV.)

    Dad: “Come on, you have to let me play now! If I don’t, the Nazis will kill everybody!”

    Me: “Nice try, Dad, but it’s a video game! It doesn’t work when you don’t play it!”

    Sister: “Yeah, Daddy! Everyone knows that Nazis aren’t real!”

    (The best part? We were hogging the TV to watch a VHS collection of World War II-era Looney Tunes cartoons.)

    Wear Your Air

    | OH, USA | Grandchildren

    (My four-year-old grandson and I are playing a game when I belched rather loudly. My grandson just stared at me for a moment, and then took a step back.)

    Grandson: “I stepped back so none of the burp got on me.”

    (He then looked all around him and checked out his clothing.)

    Grandson: “Yeah. It missed me.”

    Lost That Argument

    | Wales, UK | Parents & Guardians

    (We are all sitting at the dinner table, eating lunch. Suddenly out of nowhere I remark:)

    Me: “What was that TV show with all of the characters from Lost on it?”

    Mother: *sarcastically* “Uh, I dunno, maybe LOST!”

    (My mother and twin erupted into fits of laughter.)

    Showered With Corn Water

    | Phoenix, AZ, USA | Grandparents, Siblings

    (My grandma and my sister are talking about some of my sister’s shoes.)

    Grandma: “My gosh! These shoes don’t fit either! You are just growing like a weed! I don’t even water you!”

    Sister: *without hesitation* “But you shower me with love.”

    Got That Problem Licked

    | NY, USA | Parents & Guardians, Pets & Animals

    (I am eating leftover pizza for a small dinner. As I set myself up to eat at the computer, my cat decides to start licking one of the slices.)

    Me: “UGH. NO.” *swats the cat away* “Why would you do that?”

    (I proceed to tear off the chunk she had licked and threw it in the trash. My mom hears me and comes over.)

    Mom: “What happened?”

    Me: “She licked my pizza!”

    Mom: “Who?”

    Me: “That one!” *points at the cat*

    Mom: “So? Lick it right back.”

    (I gave her a disgusted look and she kept repeating “lick it back” all the way back to her bedroom.)