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    My Sister Can Be A Brain Drain

    | IN, USA | Siblings

    (My sister and I are driving home after seeing a concert. It’s not particularly late, but the show was loud and high-energy, so we’re both rather tired, drained, and not thinking clearly. We’re otherwise sober. I notice an elementary school’s marquee out the window.)

    Me: “Huh. [Elementary School] is doing ‘Fiddler on the Roof.’”

    Sister: “No, that’s the school corporation’s summer musical. High school.”

    Me: “Oh! I was about to say… that’s kind of heavy stuff for a middle school to be producing.”

    Sister: “That school is an elementary school.”

    Me: “Gah! Music… too… loud… brain… no… work…”

    (We arrive home at this point; my sister accidentally drives up onto the curb trying to park.)

    Sister: “Brain… thing… contagious…”

    Might Want To Put A Stop To That

    | Pepperell, MA, USA | Parents & Guardians

    (I am  just learning to drive and we are on a back road when…)

    Mom: *screaming* “Stop!”

    (Of course I slammed on the brakes and look around the empty road thinking an animal was going to run out.)

    Me: “What?! I don’t see anything!”

    Mom: “Oh, no. I just wanted a better look at that horse trailer. Sorry, honey.”

    Don’t Take It Literally

    | UT, USA | Siblings

    (My family had spent the whole day in the car to pick up new furniture. It was nearing the end of the day.)

    Brother: “I am literally starving to death.”

    Me: “You’re using ‘literally’ wrong.”

    Brother: “I literally don’t care.”

    She Will Never Join You

    | Los Angeles, CA, USA | Parents & Guardians

    (My mother, grandparents, uncle, cousin, and I are travelling from San Francisco to Los Angeles via car. We arrive at Hollywood and are driving down the Hollywood Boulevard.)

    Mom: “I can’t believe that Hollywood Boulevard looks this plain. It can’t be true!”

    Me: “Search your feelings; you know it to be true.”

    Mom: *fake panic* “Nooooooo!”

    Me: *squeaks happily* “You followed up! I didn’t actually think you would follow up!”

    Mom: “What? Follow up on what?”

    Me: “…I made a Star Wars reference.”

    Mom: “Oh. I didn’t know that. It seems I followed you up by accident.”

    Me: “…”

    (The disappointment I felt cannot be put into words.)

    Literally Driving Him Insane

    | USA | Parents & Guardians, Siblings

    (My family is taking a 12-hour road trip. My dad is driving, and is playing a song with ‘Ay yi yi yi’ over and over in the chorus. I have headphones on so it blocks out the repeated song, but my six year old brother doesn’t.)

    Brother: “Dad, can we PLEASE play another song?”

    Dad: “No.”

    Brother: “Mom!”

    Mom: “Listen to your father, kids. If he says no, then he means no!”

    (Finally we arrive. We go to get dinner at some restaurant and my brother has this haunted look on his face like he’s been through Hell.)

    Brother: *mumbling* “Ay yi yi yi… Ay yi yi yi…”

    Me: “Mom, there’s something wrong with him! He’s gone dumb!”

    Mom: “Are you okay?”

    Brother: “Fine, I have that song in my head!” *mumbling* “Ay yi yi yi…”

    (He must’ve had it in there good because it took nearly a week for him to act normally again!)


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