• Getting Him Out Of His Shell Dude - 269 votes
  • November Theme Of The Month: Thanksgiving!

    Stupid Cupid

    | Wheaton, IL, USA | Grandparents

    (I’m sitting at a table with my grandfather at my cousin’s reception. She is the only granddaughter older than I am. My grandfather is notorious for his attempts to set up my cousin, prior to her engagement.)

    (A camera flash goes off in my face.)

    Me: “Ah! My eyes! What was that for?”

    Grandpa: “For the bowling alley.”

    Me: “What?”

    Grandpa: “For the personal ad. I’m going to put it up in the bowling alley back home, just like I did with [cousin].”

    Me: “Grandpa, really? I’m only 20. I thought you didn’t start this with [cousin] until she was 23?”

    Grandpa: “It’s never too early. By the time I was your age, I was married and already had a kid.”

    Me: “Come on, Grandpa. I don’t need your help.”

    Grandpa: “What’s your phone number, so I can put it with the ad?”

    Me: “Grandpa, you live in a retirement community!”

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