(My sister gets a little silly when she’s sleep deprived. She is working the night shift on Christmas morning. I arrive at the family home to find her already in the kitchen setting up to make Christmas dinner.)

Me: “Morning! Merry Christmas!”

Sister: “Hi!”

(I notice that the paper bag on the counter is moving.)

Me: “…What’s that?”

Sister: *absently* “Hm? Oh… umm…”

Me: “Somebody’s present?”

Sister: “Oh, my no. This is Bob.”

Me: “Will Bob be joining us for dinner?”

Sister: “In the sense that he is dinner?” *pulls a large lobster out of the bag and holds it out* “Say hi, Bob!”