Not Always Related on Facebook Not Always Related on Twitter
Featured Story:
  • Never Too Old To Fight For What’s Right
    (452 thumbs up)
  • September's Theme Of The Month: Return Of The Geeks!
    Submit your story today!

    Big Kids: They Hunt In Packs

    | Devon, England, UK | Children, Parents & Guardians, Sons & Daughters, Top

    (I have just had a singing conversation with my three-year-old son while getting him ready for bed. Once we’re finished, I turn to my husband and notice he’s giving us a weird look.)

    Me: “What?”

    Husband: “I honestly don’t know if you two understand each other because he takes after you, or because you’re just perpetually three years old. Either way, there’s two of you and I’m scared.”

    Typing Up Monkey Business

    | NC, USA | Siblings

    (I’m helping my brother with a project. I’m cutting out pictures while he’s typing up a synopsis. He starts pounding the keys and typing gibberish.)

    Me: “You know, I don’t think your teacher will accept this.”

    Brother: “If I keep going, I’ll get a word!”

    Me: “Well, you know what they say, give a monkey a typewriter and eventually it’ll say something.”

    Brother: “The monkey or the typewriter?”

    Moving Out Quicker Than Sonic

    | Kansas City, MO, USA | Parents & Guardians, Pets & Animals, Sons & Daughters

    (I became engaged last year, and am currently living at home waiting for my fiancé’s lease to let out because I refuse to live with his pig roommates. The move is now in just a few months, and my father has really started to panic since I am the baby girl and the first of three girls to have a serious relationship. We have had some very serious fights over whether fiancé and I will be able to support ourselves that has really made living at home strained.)

    Father: “Is that your critter over there making all that racket?”

    Me: “Yes dad, that’s the hedgehog. I just cleaned his wheel and food bowl, so he’s being feisty.”

    Father: “Are you taking that with you when you move out?”

    Me: “Of course, I’m the only one that loves the b******.”

    Father: “…alright, you’re allowed to leave.”

    Not Even Remotely Close, Part 2

    | AB, Canada | Grandchildren, Grandparents

    Me: *noticing my Grandma is calling, I answer the phone* “Hey Gram, what’s up?”

    Grandma: *mumbling and cursing*

    Me: “Are you okay?”

    Grandma: *grumbles, curses and hangs up*

    (I call her back.)

    Grandma: “Hello?”

    Me: “Hey, Gram, did you just call me?”

    Grandma: “Er… Yes… Sort of… I was trying to change the channel and I guess I picked up the phone instead of the remote. Must have dialled your number… Couldn’t figure out why it wasn’t working until you called!”

    Related:
    Not Even Remotely Close

    Una-Cuss-tomed To Her Language

    | NJ, USA | Parents & Guardians, Sons & Daughters, Teenagers

    (My 18-year-old college freshman daughter has just used the “F” word in front of me. I give her ‘The Look’.)

    Daughter: “Sorry; it’s just that I swear all the time at college. I probably use that word in every other sentence.”

    Me: “You know, that reflects poorly on your vocabulary skills.”

    Daughter: “Oh, it’s okay! I know plenty of other curse words, too!”


    Page 415/681First...413414415416417...Last
    « Previous Page
    Next Page »