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  • Stupid For Not Trying
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  • Date Night Fright

    | CA, USA | Children, Sons & Daughters, Theme Of The Month

    (My husband and I have come back from a date night, having left our five-year-old and two-year-old daughters with a much-liked babysitter. When we come back, my five-year-old daughter proceeds to interrogate me.)

    Daughter: “Why did you and Daddy go out for dinner?”

    Me: “To spend some time together.”

    Daughter: “You wanted to be alone?”

    Me: “Yes.”

    Daughter: “Why?”

    Me: “So that we could talk.”

    Daughter: “But no hugging?”

    Me: “…”

    Forgot Your Words But They Remember

    | VA, USA | Children, Grandchildren

    (I get my three-year-old grandson strapped into his car seat in the back of my truck and go to get in the driver side. Just as I close my door, I remember that I forgot something inside the house. It’s been one of those days so when I realize I forgot it, I mumbled:)

    Me: “S***!”

    Grandson: “What did you forget?”

    An Appropriate Response

    | Finland | Children, Sons & Daughters

    (My husband, my 11-year-old daughter, and I are shopping. Near the lingerie department, we see an underwear ad that features a model dancing in only a bra and panties.)

    Daughter: “That picture is really weird. Why does she look like that?”

    Husband: “It’s supposed to make the underwear look fun and exciting.”

    Daughter: “It mostly looks scary and inappropriate.”

    Husband: “…I will accept that answer.”

    His Plans Show Promise

    | TX, USA |

    Dad: *as he is getting ready to leave the house* “Stay out of trouble.”

    Me: “No promises.”

    Dad: “And I mean felony trouble.”

    Me: “… No promises.”

    No Longer Your Little Bundle Of Joy

    | Williamston, NC, USA | Children, Sons & Daughters

    (I am teasing my three-year old daughter, who frequently follows me around saying, ‘What you doing, Mama?’ We are watching Wheel of Fortune together.)

    Me: “What you doing? What you doing? Hmm?”

    Daughter: “Stop it, Mama!”

    Me: *sticks out tongue* “Killjoy!”

    Daughter: “No! You can’t kill joy! I need joy!” *goes back to watching Wheel of Fortune*

    Getting Your Buzz On

    | Denver, CO, USA | Siblings

    (My family, my fiancé, and I are playing Buzz Word, which is a game in which you have to come up with sayings or phrases using a specific word based of clues on the card. The word is ‘Get’).

    Step-Mom: *reading a clue from the card* “Dating agenda.”

    Younger Brother: “Get some!”

    (We had to stop playing for several minutes because everyone was laughing so hard.)

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