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    An Unknown Leftist Agenda

    | TX, USA | Siblings

    (My sister is driving, and I am the passenger. At the last minute she asks me which way she needs to go on the freeway.)

    Sister: “Which way do I need to go, east or west?”

    Me: “West.”

    Sister: “Which way is that? Left or right?”

    Me: “LEFT!”

    Sister: “WHICH WAY IS THAT?!”

    (I reach across her, pointing left.)

    Me: “THAT WAY!”

    They Grow Up So Fast

    | Morayfield, QLD, Australia | Sons & Daughters, Teenagers, Top

    (It’s just after Christmas. I’m in a game store with my sister while my parents go to buy movie tickets at the theater in the mall. My sister and I both have prepaid debit cards to spend. We’re browsing, looking for things to buy, when our parents turn up.)

    Me: “I thought you were going to wait for us at the theater.”

    Mom: “We were, but we realized they probably wouldn’t let her use her card without an adult present.”

    Me: “Mom, I’m 18. I am an adult.”

    Mom: *sudden look of realization*

    A Study Into How The Cookie Crumbles

    | Auckland, New Zealand | Children, Sons & Daughters

    (My friend and her three-year-old daughter are having an exchange.)

    Daughter: “Mummy, can I have a cookie?”

    Friend: “No you’ve already had one and I need to study.”

    Daughter: “Well, I need to study the cookie.”

    Girl Power

    | Oklahoma City, OK, USA | Children, Sons & Daughters, Top

    (I’m playing a game with my three-year-old daughter by waving a “magic wand” and turning her into various things. This game has been going on for about a minute and she’s gotten into the routine.)

    Me: *poof* “You’re a rabbit.”

    Daughter: “I don’t want to be a rabbit.”

    Me: *poof* “You’re a zebra.”

    Daughter: “I don’t want to be a zebra.”

    Me: *poof* “You’re a cat.”

    Daughter: “I don’t want to be a cat.”

    Me: *poof* “You’re a girl.”

    Daughter: “I don’t want to be a— HOORAY! I’m a girl!”

    Meet The Pun Family, Part 4

    | CT, USA | Parents & Guardians, Siblings

    (My dad, two sisters, and I are driving home in the snow. My sisters are arguing because one of them has opened the window and the other one is cold.)

    Me: “Guy, guys, chill. No, wait. Never mind. That was a really bad pun. Never mind. Forget it.”

    Dad: “Yeah, that was very bad. We don’t need to be any colder.”

    Me: “And I can’t say ‘cool it’ either. How about, ‘bring it down a few notches?’ No, wait, that’s still about the temperature. Noooo!”

    (We laugh.)

    Me: “Here, let me cool us down.”

    (I move to open my window, but don’t.)

    Sister: *in protest* “Noooo! Don’t!”

    Dad: “If you keep doing things like that, I’ll think you’re a flake.”

    Sister: “Okay, guys. Let’s calm down.”

    Dad: “Yeah, we don’t want to drift from the topic.”

    Related:
    Meet The Pun Family, Part 3
    Meet The Pun Family, Part 2
    Meet The Pun Family


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