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    Dog Has It’s Day Everyday

    | Enfield, CT, USA | Cousins, Pets & Animals

    (I’m staying with my cousin and her pitbull for the weekend. I see my cousin cutting up a large amount of chicken. She’s vegetarian, so naturally this arouses my curiosity.)

    Me: “What are you doing with all that chicken?”

    Cousin: “Making dog food.”

    Me: “… Why?”

    Cousin: “Because she’s allergic to canned dog food. And because I don’t have children. That, too.”

    Pushy About The Push-Ups

    | Edina, MN, USA | Parents & Guardians, Siblings

    (My mom and I are helping my little sister shop for her first bra, and she is very nervous. My mom has been more than a little pushy about things and my sister finally snaps.)

    Mom: “Does it… Does it feel good?”

    Sister: “Yes.”

    Mom: “Does it do what it’s supposed to?”

    Sister: “Let me put it this way: it supports the Minnesota twins.”

    Didn’t Think That One (Drive) Through

    , | Chicago, IL, USA | Children, Sons & Daughters, Theme Of The Month

    (My daughter is six years old when we stop at a popular restaurant to grab a bite to eat. We go through the drive-thru.)

    Speaker: “Hello. Welcome to [Restaurant]. I’ll be with you in just a moment.”

    Daughter: “Aw, mom, lets go somewhere else. We got their answering machine!”

    My Family And Other (Extinct) Animals, Part 2

    | France | Grandchildren, Grandparents, Theme Of The Month

    (My four-year-old is looking at her grandmother.)

    Daughter: “Gran, when you were young, did you have TV?”

    Gran: “No. No TV, no computer, no DVD. And the radio was really big.”

    Daughter: “Oh, gran, how sad. You were lucky when you were young!”

    Gran: “Why is that?”

    Daughter: “Well… you got to play with your pet dinosaur. I can’t do that because they are all extinct!”

    Related:
    My Family And Other (Extinct) Animals
    My Family And Other Animals

    Enlisting Some Help

    | WA, USA | Parents & Guardians

    (My mom is going to drop me off at my class and then go shopping.)

    Mom: “Are you ready to go?”

    Me: “Yeah. Do you have your list?”

    Mom: “It’s in my head.”

    Me: “Um, you should probably write it down. You never remember your head lists.”

    Mom: “It’s fine. You wanted shampoo, right?”

    Me: “Uh, try deodorant?”

    Mom: “… I’ll go write it down.”


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